The beginning of my favorite season has arrived...all the good movies come out, and the weather gets cold. I'm in heaven.

So my financing thing is going through after all. Here's the scoop: I got hired to produce and direct a commercial for a stock company in New York. Which is pretty darn cool. We're shooting it this coming weekend, on luxurious 35mm. I'm pretty excited. The money we make from it will pretty much pay for 'Still.' Plus, I'll have a big commercial to add to my resume.

And of course, the cast list is now online. Except for poor Mark...I haven't finished casting him yet. I have a few frontrunners...but I just want to be sure I make the right decision.

The new shoot date is November 2nd. Almost a year since I wrote the darn thing. I hope it doesn't take me this long to get my next project off the ground. But I guess I've got a good excuse. I've been pretty busy this past year, and have a lot of stuff to show for it (a lot of which will be showing at the Deep Ellum Film Festival this year).

I'm going to go outside for a few moments and enjoy the weather.

September 22, 2001

It'll be just a little bit longer before I announce the cast. Still have some minor decision making to do...

I ran a private midnight screening of Lucio Fulci's classic Italian zombie film 'The Beyond' last night. It was wonderful, and inspired me to write a new script called 'Kung Fu Zombies In Love.' It'll be great, if I ever write it. Although, I remember after I saw 'A.I.' I wanted to write a sci-fi script. I got about six lines into it and lost interest. But a kung fu zombie love story? How can you top that?

I finished editing 'The Tunnel' in two twelve hour shifts. I'm fairly happy with it...I guess, but I think it really is too long. Ramzi, the director, loves it, but I think there's a lot of stuff that could be cut out. I'm a big fan of the 'kill your babies' adage...and there are a whole lot of babies in the script. As it is, I think audiences aren't going to respond to it at all. Anyway, it should be premiering at the Deep Ellum Film Festival, which is also where 'Secrets Underneath' is playing. I might try to get 'Hot Pussy' in there, too, if I have some extra cash. I can hardly bring myself to say that title...I always call it 'the cat movie.' Uh oh. I guess I gave the whole thing away there. Everyone always says its my best work. Goofy. We made the whole thing in eight hours, and it's my best work.

September 14, 2001

Well, things sure changed in a hurry.

Like most of the country, I spent all day Tuesday in state of confusion, fear and bewilderment, trying to comprehend exactly what was happening.

The aftershocks of the tragedy will of course never go away, and will be felt strongly for quite some time...but that can't stop us from moving on. My optimistic streak is coming in handy now. My friend Ramzi put it best: "Although we apparently live in hell, art and filmmaking must go on!" Among other things, of course.

But I've pushed 'Still' back a little more once again. My plans for financing it, which I won't go into yet, most likely won't go through in light of this week's events. So I'll need a little bit more time to raise money for the films stock, camera package, grip stuff, etc. We've got a new DP...Mr. Jason Croft, who I've had the pleasure of working with several times before and is, I might add, a phenomenal painter of light. The film is pretty much cast. Once everything settles down a little more, and I can feel comfortable turning my attentions to my own project again, I'll announce the lineup. Give me about a week, I imagine.

Until then...well, I'm going to start editing 'The Tunnel' tomorrow. Which is only a few hours away...whaddayaknow. I hope I can find enough room on my computer...I really need to delete 'Lullaby' one of these days.

So here's to keeping it real! Oh wait...I mean, here's to...well, something. Fill in the blanks.

September 2, 2001

Just got back from a midnight show of 'Raising Arizona...' one of the best movies ever made. I love that film so much...and once again, the magic of the big screen worked its spell on me and I was about to bawl at the end. It's so sweet and beautiful and funny...I'm such a pushover. I need to toughen up.

But seriously, it's easily on my list of top ten films...I follow Steven Sodebergh's criteria...any movie that you would drop anything to go see should be on your top ten. What's me list? I don't know, I'll have to think about it. But 'Raising Arizona' is on it.

I wish I didn't have to push callbacks another week...I really am excited about getting the cast finalized. But I have to shoot pickups on 'The Tunnel' tomorrow morning, which will be fun in and of itself. It's a great crew, and a terrific set to be on. Heck, it inspired me to shoot 'Still' on 16mm. Back to 'Still,' though, I can't wait to start rehearsing, because I HATE that process and want to get it over as soon as possible. But we're going to have to do a lot of rehearsing...so everyone can nail everything on one take.

Okay, time for some shut-eye. And while my eyes are shut, I'll dream that I'm lighter than air, like an ether, floating into the future and eating sand. Wait, I don't think I got the line right...hmmm...it's late. What can I say.

August 27, 2001

The first auditions went well. The first five hours were actually fun...although the last two grew increasingly exhausting. But we saw a lot of people, some of whom will be getting called back this coming Sunday, and some of whom will probably walk away with roles in the film.

Last night, I watched 'Leon,' the international cut of 'The Professional.' This movie has always held a special spot in my heart (I first saw it when I was 13), but as I got older I didn't think it was as good as it was the first time. But watching the international version, with 24 minutes of additional footage, was like seeing an entirely new film. I bought the DVD a year ago and never watched it...I was missing out. It was ten times as moving as it was before. Everything has so much more resonance...an entire act of the movie was cut out for American audiences...an act that could never be released in America, especially with today's political climate. But it is beautiful, and during Natalie Portman's 'Love Or Death' speech I almost cried. As my friend Ben put it, "It was a good movie before...this is a great movie."

So go buy it and watch it.

August 23, 2001

Well, that was an annoying delay in activity. I'm going to have to remember to pay the hosting bill on time next time...nothing like a few days offline to erase yourself from the public conciousness.

So how the hell did I get back to shooting 'Still' on 16mm? Well, I was working on that short film 'Secrets Underneath,' which is some of the best DPing I've done yet, and the lens on the XL-1 was just pissing me off. It's nearly impossible to follow focus, it was really hard to get a crips ECU focus in low light...basically, the lack of a truly manual lens was getting on my nerves. So I thought, what if I just spent 1500 dollars to rent a DSR 500 (a professional DV camera) for the shoot?

Then I went to work on 'The Tunnel' which was a lot of fun (and I may be editing that one as well). It was a 16mm project. And I thought...you know, I could buy 12 400 ft.rolls of Kodak 320T filmstock for about 1500 bucks. That's two hours of film. If I rehearsed the hell out of the cast...so that they could nail everything in no more than two takes...it might just work. Of course, developing the film and getting the telecine would cost more money, but I can worry about that later.

So, with words of encouragement from other filmmakers, I suddenly decided that 'Still' would be shot on 16mm. And that's that. I'm going backwards...suddenly, I'll be saying, "I'll never shoot DV again!"

Let's see if this plan pans out.

I'm still recovering from 'Apocalypse Now Redux' last night. What a harrowing experience. This weekend, I'm seeing 'Taxi Driver' at the midnight movies at the Inwood. I can't wait. It was weird thinking that 'Taxi Driver' was from the same director of 'Gangs Of New York.' That trailer looks good, but it's just kind of...I don't know. I'm sure the movie will be phenomenal, but I could have cut a better trailer than that.

July 24, 2001

Well, I haven't moved this page's link yet. I think I'll wait because I'm in the process of revamping the site, once again. I think some FLASH will be introduced...the main page will possibly be looking quite different in one month's time.

I've already slightly changed the movie review template to make it easier on the eyes. I've been getting a lot of great feedback on the reviews lately, which makes me very happy. I always figured no one read that section. But apparently it's one of the best parts of the site. Yay!

My new script is coming along swimmingly, although I've hardly worked on it this past week. Procrastination strikes. I'm about to open it up an type away at it, but if you'd like to look at the nearly impenetrable first 50 or so pages, they're right here. It's kind of a rewrite of an old script I wrote that is ABSOLUTELY GODAWFUL, but apparently had something worth going back to. In no way will I ever make that original script available to the public (or anyone at all).

Oh, and one last thing...for the first time in history, and interview with me is available at Indie Club, that most excellent filmmaking website. Now I know how awful it is to read your own words in print.

July 15, 2001

I still am not going to disclose the details of my mistake, as it still may be retractable, although I doubt it...Oh, what the hell. I left the two copies of my script, required for the TFPF grant, out of the envelope. And then I suddenly realized I had sent the rest of the application to the wrong address. So I figured everything had gone to hell.

So the other day I get the postcard from the Austin Film Society, saying they had recieved my application, so it turns out I had sent it to the right address. Insecurity attacks again, I guess...so now I'm going to Fed Ex the script to them and hope they still accept it.

Still, I've decided against shooting on HD. I just don't think I can afford to do it. Unless some miracle happens. The official 'Still' page will soon reflect this change...also, I've rescheduled shooting for September 13-18. I think those are the right dates, at least.

I'm also going to be moving the link to this page to somewhere else on the front page. It's kind of confusing for new visitors, I imagine, to click on a menu logo and get sent here. I'll make a new button for it. So if you ever visit this page, and one day you click on the menu logo and nothing happens, don't worry. All this pointless rambling is still here, just look for the new link.

Boy, the trailer for 'Black Hawk Down' looks really really good...although Ridley Scott films seem to leave a bad taste in my mouth; I loved 'Gladiator' when I first saw it, and I like 'Hannibal,' but both of them have kind of...paled, in my opinion, after a bit of time. But this trailer looks great, probably because of the song used in it ('Knockin' On Heaven's Door'). The trailer for 'Training Day' is also fantastic and very edgy, although I imagine the film won't be as good. But it's a great trailer and DAMN my cat has sharp claws. Ouch.

I made a big freakin' mistake which may or may not nail the lid in the coffin of my plans to shoot 'Still' on HD. It sucks. I really don't know if I'll be able to pull it off now. At least on that level. I was super confident until about five o'clock yesterday...well, I'll go into the problem when I know for sure that it's irreversable.

In light of my frustration with A.I., I picked up the new Close Encounters Of The Third Kind DVD. That sure is a great film. The new documentary on it is incredible. And the old 1977 featurette is SO well edited, with all the split screen stuff. So much more fascinating than the incredibly bland EPK stuff that is put out these days. It's a DVD you should go buy right now.

I've kinda started turning the wheels in my head for a science fiction-esque story of my own...I think I may start to develop it as I finish up my current script (50 pages now) and rework the one I just finished (which got a thumbs up from one of my closest but critical friends today, so that's good).

I'm enjoying the 2-6 lifestyle these days (two in the afternoon to six in the morning, give or take a few hours here or there). It's killing my bank account though.

June 27, 2001

I've changed the 'Still' page once again; now the only start date is a vague mention of 'this fall.' I'm gonna wait and see if I get the grant. If I do, it's HD all the way. If not, well, the XL-1 never hurt anyone. My friend Curtis and I just shot a short film with it the other night -- we conceived, shot, edited and scored the entire five minute movie in nine hours, and it turned out really really well. We're going to go ahead and send it to some festivals. The title is 'Hot Pussy.' Make of that what you will.

Back to the grant...I'd like to thank my fellow filmmakers Yen Tan, Kat Candler and Ramzi Abed for their awesome letters of support. Thanks, guys...if I get the grant, it'll be mainly because of your very very supportive words.

I'm gonna start my list of ten best movies early. So far this year...

But A.I. comes out Friday...so that list may change.

I'm so addicted to movies. It's not even funny.

June 19, 2001

I was walking home from the conveniance store this evening and came across a dead turtle on the side of the road. It's shell was cracked, and it was obviously the victim of roadkill. The strange thing was that it was a really big turtle. What the hell is a great big turtle doing in the street in a strictly urban area with no bodies of water nearby? I stared at it for a while, trying to spin myself into a David Lynch / Coen Brothers style scene, where something horribly absurd pops up in everyday life. It kind of worked. I then considered walking down the pitch black alley adjacent to me to see what weird things happened next. I decided not to, for fear of being shot or stabbed or something like that.

Ah, aimless writing. How I love it. Now stop reading this and go buy a copy of the soundtrack.

June 18, 2001

Gosh darn it, I HATE writing grants!

I get an intial copy of 'Lullaby' back from the duplicators tomorrow; the only complete copy of the movie I had was on Beta, and I haven't wanted to make VHS copies because a.) I haven't had any money and b.) I wasn't sure if the sound levels were good. So now I'll have a VHS copy to review, and if it's suitable I'll proceed with mass duplication. If not, I'll have to readjust the levels in the computer. Which shouldn't be too much of a problem -- I turned on my G4 today and cleaned it out, arranged everything in nice tidy files, etc. It was a huge mess, random files strewn everywhere. But it's all okay now.

I can't wait for A.I. to come out; the ads are just too good. I don't know if I'm looking forward to that more than Planet Of The Apes or not -- I think I am. I don't know if anything can top Moulin Rouge, though.

I'm thirty pages into my new script now. I actually had most of those pages written before I started the one I finished last week, but I've rewritten most of them. Being productive is a nice feeling. If I could be prolific and productive, I'm sure I would feel even nicer.

June 16, 2001

Well, I just changed the 'Still' page slightly. Now, shooting on HD is our goal, not an absolute. I am currently working on my application for the Texas Filmmaker's Production Fund from the Austin Film Society. I'm asking for 5 Grand. If I don't get it...well, I'll probably just shoot it on an XL-1. I'd started to forget that I always told people that the medium doesn't matter, it's all about the story. Well, I think I should start to remember that now. Because I think it's a damn good story, and I really want to tell it. If I have to tell it with an XL-1...well, an XL-1 will do just fine.

June 12, 2001

Last night -- or this morning -- at approximately 5 AM, I finally finished a full length script for the first time since I wrote 'Lullaby,' I've written several hundred pages of unfinished scripts since then, but now for the first time I've achieved some sort of completion. And it only took me a month. It's nice to know I still have it in me. It desperately needs a rewrite, I can already tell, but I think I'll write another script first and come back to this one next month. I have a bunch of ideas ready to go...some of them are already started, in fact.

Interestingly, I'll actually have another script finished within the week; this one is a collaborative effort which we are doing purely for financial reasons. It's a teen comedy in the spirit of 'American Pie.' The title? 'The Art Of Spring Break.' Now if that's not brilliant, I don't know what is.

I'm seriously wondering whether or not we'll be able to raise 10 grand by August. I just don't know. If we don't...I could either put it off until we do, or just shoot it on the XL-1. It's a win-some, lose-some situation. I really want to shoot on HD...but I also really want to direct again soon, and I want to be able to submit it to Sundance because I have this gut feeling...

Well, if anyone reading this feels like becoming my personal savior, feel free to let me know!

May 30, 2001

I went back and read all the old news pages and all the archives of this page last night; it's really funny, especially in the news page, watching the website evolve. I always wrote everything, every word on the site, but I always pretended that I didn't. I wrote everything in the third person, and then every now and then 'David' would write a message, and it would be a big deal. Stupid. Of course, Adam wrote stuff now and then...but I haven't seen him in months. I don't think he's really proactive with the company anymore.

Which is how things have tended to happen. People get pissed off at me, or vice versa, and names that were long involved in my projects gradually disappear. It's an odd phenomenon.

Let's see...a year ago, I had just finished the first 8 1/2 minutes of the movie. And I had just started this page! Wow. An anniversary party is in order. I think I'm going to cry, actually. I'm too damn wrapped up in the past. Last summer was a good summer...good things happened. And bad things. But they always seem like good things through the haze of time.

Another interesting thing...all the other projects I always would hint at. Various short films, various scripts...they're all sitting around in various stages of completion. All the times I wrote about how Adam was planning the 'Lullaby' premiere...well, he actually was most of the time. I just never had the movie ready for the numerous dates we actually had set down.

If this site ever becomes famous, there will be a lot of people wondering where all the little threads I dropped along the way lead to. Most of them lead to nowhere. But some don't.

Okay, I've reminisced enough for now. I'll be back with more pointless drivel soon enough.

I accidentally stabbed myself in the hand tonight; it was pretty hilarious. The knife almost went clean through and there were pools of blood everywhere. It was like one of those Saturday Night Live skits; I've never seen blood gush like that, espcially coming from myself.

Anyway, now I'm having trouble typing as quickly as I normally do; my hand is kind of sore.

It's not that bad compared to my emminent death by lack of faith in everything else; I don't really know if I actually think I can get 'Still' off the ground at the level we want, or if I'm just working on it as some sort of self validation to make up for everything else I'm not doing or not doing the right way.

I hate this part of the creative process.

But because I'm an eternally pessimistic optimist, I don't let it get me down. If I did, I probably would have gone into shock at the sight of all that blood. As it was, though, I just couldn't stop laughing.

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