August 06, 2005
I had to get a physical yesterday, something I've successfully avoided ever doing until now. It wasn't that bad, though, and as a bonus I got to have blood drawn, which I've always found an enjoyable process.
While I was in the waiting room, I overheard pieces of conversations. Discussions of ailments and such. Sitting behind me was an elderly woman with a friend or caretaker who was filling out a form for her. Part of the form must have involved deceased family members, because the friend kept asking her about various relatives and when they had died and what they had died of. It took a few moments for the older woman to remember some of these things. She would drift off, or not hear the question at all. Then she would matter of factly recall that her father had died when he was sixty four, her mother when she was eighty.
"What about Jackie?" the friend asked. The old woman didn't respond. The question was repeated.
"Who?" she asked.
"Your son? Didn't you call him Jackie?"
She thought some more. I couldn't see her sitting behind me, but I could picture her thinking. I imagined her nodding her head when she finally said "Yes, John. But we called him Jackie."
The same tone of voice. Matter of fact. "He died in a car accident when he was six." She thought for a few moments more, and then added "It was a hit and run, really."
The sound of the pen writing this down. Other people talking quietly. The old woman getting up to slowly walk to the counter to ask her own question of the nurses there. Pink shirt. Looking younger than I expected. Six years old. How long ago was that? Eventually her name was called and she and her friend or caretaker left.
The morning at the doctor's office became, in retrospect, a prelude to the film I saw at the festival last night entitled The Phantom Limb, from director Jay Rosenblatt. The film is a twelve part abstract essay on death and loss, and it's the best film I've seen all year.
Sometime afterwards, I watched an hour of a feature film, and while it was quite good, I eventually had to leave. Partially because my blood sugar was dropping precipitously, but also because there just didn't really seem to be a point to seeing any other films that night.
Posted by David Lowery at August 6, 2005 01:49 PM